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The past and present life of the “Rose Boy” – Finding one’s sense of belonging through understanding

Updated: Jun 11, 2023

Recently, a movie called “Marry My Dead Body” has sparked a heated discussion. The movie centers around the theme of homosexuality, and it broke the box office record in just 9 days, becoming the best-selling movie this season. With the movie gaining more views and popularity, the issue surrounding homosexuality has become more widely known and talked about. More people are curious to know more about homosexuality now. How did homosexuality come about and how should it be treated from now on? Let’s examine this issue through “Systemic Thinking”, as well as from a few real-life cases, to gain a better understanding.

To understand homosexuality, we first have to understand what is Systemic Thinking. In Systemic Thinking, every member in a family has their own place. Everyone has their own place, path, mutual influence and mutual balance towards one another, just like the planets aligned in their own positions in the solar system. When a planet loses its balance or disappears, the gravitational pull of the entire system will collapse, causing displacement and even collisions between other planets. This causes a change in how planets interact with one another, and the entire solar system would have to function under a new equilibrium.

As such, in a similar way, we can regard homosexuality in the family as the “displaced planet” in the system. This displacement is caused as a result of the other “planets” (other roles of family members) losing their balance in the system. Despite so, it is with this displacement that would ultimately lead to the restoration of balance in the (family) system once again.

In some of the real-life cases surrounding homosexuality that we’ve seen, through family constellation arrangement, we would often see that there had been a history of adoption and premature death in the family. Through this logic, the reason why homosexuals become homosexuals is often because they are able to find motivation and identify with those of the opposite gender at the collective unconscious level. For example, a nephew may have a strong connection to the energy of his deceased aunt or have a leaning towards the aunt, or there may be a lack of connection with family members or relatives of the same gender. For example, a son who strongly identifies with his mother but lacks a connection with his father, or a daughter who over-identifies with male family members but dislikes the female members etc. etc.

Certainly, most of these identifications occur in the collective unconscious level of the family constellation, and the individuals involved are often unaware of it, or even unaware of the existence or events of these family members on a conscious level. Therefore, the issue of homosexuality cannot be explained solely at the surface level.

No matter what the reasons or parameters are, the cause of it all ultimately goes back to the Systemic Thinking perspective mentioned above. All of these occurrences stem from an excessive love for one's own family, and the need to restore balance in the family system, which had led to the movement and change of one’s position or role, in order to fill the void.

In other words, homosexuality is not something that is intentional or deliberate, but rather, originates from the driving force of love in life, prompting them to rise and to find the right balance and order in their own family system.

Therefore, what we can do for homosexual/LGBTQ+ individuals is to respect their way of loving the family, and not be too affected by moral criticism. We should try to go beyond the collective consciousness of the society and come to a spiritual conscience, to accept these friends who carry different identities as equals. We should also let go of our mindset of wanting to help or save them. Instead, we ought to interact with them in a natural manner, and also try to get to know them better. By seeing who they are for who they are, these LGBTQ+ individuals will feel a lot more supported. These interactions will also broaden our life perspective.

Homosexuality isn’t a problem; the real issue is how to achieve one’s own life.

Having read to this point, some readers might ask: “If the issues regarding the driving force behind one’s homosexuality were resolved, would a homosexual stop being a homosexual?” Well, truth is, a question like this takes on a narrowed perspective as it is based off the mindset of seeing homosexuality as a problem. However, the main point is that, through the homosexual individual, we will be able to identify and recognize the imbalance in the family system. Identifying the imbalance will let the force behind the imbalance be made known, and we can therefore resolve and disintegrate it. Through that, and not forgetting how Systemic Thinking leads to mutual influence, members of the family will be able to live their lives well and thrive further. This is then the main point that needs to be addressed. The issue is not homosexuality itself, but rather how can one return to their own rightful position and fulfill their life, is then the real big question.

There are two key forces that preserve emotional relationships

1. The driving force behind the propagation of life

2. The power of love

It will require more effort to maintain a relationship through only one force.

Through Systemic Thinking, we have gained a better understanding of the cause of homosexuality. And through the Law of Life, we are able to help our homosexual/LGBTQ+ friends find a happy place to belong to. The greatest desire of the LGBTQ+ community is love. Love can overcome anything. Like anyone else, LGBTQ+ individuals are just as worthy of love. Love knows no boundaries. Everyone has the same capacity to love. Love can nourish the body, mind and soul of the LGBTQ+ people as well.

However, it can be quite a challenge for same-sex couples to have a lasting relationship and intimate love. This is because the union of opposite sexes has a driving force for the propagation of life behind them. The natural physiological connection provides a bond that helps sustain relationships, but for same-sex couples, there is a lack of the drive of procreation to support the relationship.

Therefore, looking at most typical families who are often already struggling to maintain their relationships, it will be even harder for same-sex couples to maintain their relationships, due to the lack of the driving force of propagation of life. It's very tough to rely solely on the love of two people to keep going. To achieve a long-lasting and stable relationship, same-sex couples must cultivate a significant level of maturity in love and emotions. Additionally, the driving force behind the propagation of life serves as an important source that brings about balance and satisfaction for the inner being of everyone. This force maintains a balance at the biological level. For example, we often hear new mothers say how they feel fulfilled after giving birth to a child, and that their lives are complete now.

The rule of balance shapes the way of life development

The experiences that homosexual individuals have to go through often lack the ability to provide balance to the driving force of the propagation of life. That is to say, they have received life from the world, but they have no way to repay life through reproduction. This leads to a sense of inadequacy and emptiness in the collective unconscious level, which would bring about negative projections and influences to homosexual individuals. E.g. indulging in inappropriate relationships, addiction, choosing to self-harm, chronic suicide, engaging in various risky behaviors etc. They unconsciously weaken their own life force and vitality through various means.

To transform this sort of distorted damage and help life find its way back to happiness, we need to start with the Law of Life and work from the spiritual level. We have to start from raising our spiritual level, to let homosexual individuals contribute to the higher levels of life despite the intrinsic limitation of not being able to pass on life through biological reproduction – to serve the greater good of life in other ways. That is, to make higher-level contributions to life through transforming small acts of love into greater acts of love, and make a positive impact in the society. For example, engaging in charity work, doing work that benefits the society with love, caring for all life and serving the community etc. Through engaging meaningful work that serve the greater good, homosexual individuals can then realize the meaning and value of their lives, while also attaining balance and profound satisfaction in their lives, without the need to numb or punish themselves through negative means due to their inner void.

Through the perspectives of Systemic Thinking and the Law of Life, have you gained a deeper understanding of the homosexual/LGBTQ+ community now? Or perhaps, our LGBTQ+ friends might have now gained more clarity and direction in their lives?

Homosexuality is not the problem. The real issue is how to achieve one’s own life, and how to create profound satisfaction and peace of mind. This applies to everyone. Therefore, by redirecting our attention inward to cultivate our inner being, we will be able to achieve true and everlasting fulfillment. Regardless of sexual orientation, everyone has to work towards greater heights of life. We do not have to be too concerned about our identities on the surface level. As long as we walk our paths well and love correctly, different lives can equally bloom into brilliant flowers. Be it the “Rose Boy” or the “Lotus Master”, they can both have their own unique fragrance and succeed through their own unique qualities.

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