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[Case Study] Why Don't I Like Money?

Why don't I like money? There are people around us who cannot resist the urge to spend money. Once they have it, they unconsciously and uncontrollably let it slip away. Some even dislike money so much that they intentionally squander it all. For these people, their relationship with money often veers toward another extreme, one they may not even recognize or acknowledge. What is causing these people to "dislike money"? What are the underlying reasons behind these behaviors?  [Case Study] Meet Yuxia, who finds herself constantly compelled to spend money on others. She doesn’t understand why. When her brother bought a house, she spent hundreds of thousands on him. The same for her brother's children. She feels she dislikes money and always wants to spend it all. But she doesn’t spend it on herself most of the time. So, what happened between her and money? What's the dynamic at play here between her and money? In exploring the relationship between "Yuxia" and "Money," we uncover intriguing insights. Yuxia's representative senses a significant barrier between herself and money, while the representative of money feels stressful, and a reluctance to be close to Yuxia. Teacher Chou Ting Wen asked Yuxia, "How's your relationship with your mother?" She replied that she and her mother had a good relationship; thus, when her mother passed away, she was devastated. Then, she talked about her mother's passing. Her mother was a Christian during her lifetime, but after her death, the family decided on a Buddhist funeral ritual. "Why?" Teacher Chou asked, confused. "Because my grandfather was a Buddhist. Before my mother passed away, their conflicting religious beliefs led to severe conflicts and estrangement. I eventually convinced the family to choose the Buddhist ritual, hoping it would bring reconciliation between my mother and grandfather.” Evidently, out of her love for her mom, Yuxia has taken on a lot of responsibility for her mom. She even subconsciously carried the cross that was on her mother's back. She wants to save their big family in place of her mother, and so, Yuxia has always been spending money for her family,”  Teacher Chou explained. We can offer support and help, but we must also grasp the wisdom of giving without holding onto the need to rescue others. Moreover, we must learn to live for ourselves, to live our own brilliance. Yuxia said that if she doesn't help her family, and doesn't provide them with financial support, she would feel a heavy sense of guilt. Yes, it's this guilt that we must bravely carry, maintaining our economic and spiritual independence and freedom. That's growth; that's mature love. We cannot burden ourselves with others' responsibilities because of our guilt, depriving them of the chance to grow. (Names in the text have been changed for anonymity. Snippet from a workshop led by Teacher Chou Ting Wen.)


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